Company of
Angels?
We are told, a friend in
need is a friend indeed. We are also told that friends are like angels
who are ready to lend a finger to hold on to and a shoulder to cry on. They
mingle with you on a daily basis. They know your strengths, weaknesses,
blackspots, and almost everything. There is a kind of heart-to-heart
exchange of notes on a daily basis. Over the years, you placed all the
cards in their hands. You went out of the way in order to help someone
crying for help. You sacrificed your time, money, and effort on a number
of occasions. You shared their grief and got involved in matters that have
dragged you into messy, embarrassing situations, You spent money left and right
in order to ensure solace and comfort to the so-called holy cows.
In a brutally competitive world, you thought you need to stand by your
friend(s) in order to survive and flourish. You left no stone unturned while
trying to extend emotional support apart from financial help on a number of
occasions. It was a pretty joyful
journey spanning many, many years. Every moment spent in the company of the
soulmates —you were certain were blissful, golden moments. It was all a
thing of the past you realize on the day when the tables suddenly turned
against you.
Sukh
Ke Sab Saathi Dukh Mein Na Koi
You are in trouble
now. You got trapped due to reasons not known to you. The evil
forces seem to have laid the trap. The exit options are few and with
every passing moment, the troubles—real or imaginary—seem to multiply.
You remain unfazed, unmoved, and not at all perplexed. The reason is simple;
you have a vast army of friends who would come to your rescue and save you from
awkward moments of any or every kind. You begin to knock at the doors of
comrades, associates, colleagues, and acquaintances from the Holy book
preserved by you. A series of calls remain unanswered. The people who
borrowed your hard-earned money for buying daily groceries and cigarettes seem
to have found a new companion. The ones who walked into your bedroom at
midnight seeking your help seem to have gone into a deep slumber. The
ones who had free lunch in your home almost every alternate day seem to have
forgotten your name.
Traitors,
conspirators & turncoats
Therefore, be wary of
friends for they are the ones who betray you in no time. You learn now that
they were jealous. They resented your success and popularity. They
did not like the way you were crossing milestones in your professional
life. They swallowed the agony in silence for a painfully long time
The problem was that you often did not know your friends as well as
you imagined. They seem to have agreed with you, in order to avoid an
argument. They played a cover-up story all along in order to suppress
their evil thoughts and negative feelings. All the time they were singing
a song in front of you glorifying your achievements beyond description.
You believed those comments as genuine and real. Now when life has turned
upside down, you are able to draw the curtain between friends and foes.
Each passing day you realize that the same friend whom you trusted most has
joined hands gleefully with your enemies in order to settle scores. Most
others seem to have put their self-respect, dignity, and honesty on the mat
while trying to show the door to you. The carping & ridicule
continues for days together while you are being hunted in the economic jungle.
When you are able to put the finger on the problem causing trouble finally, you
realize that they were resentful of everything. Not only your success but
the success of even your children. At the first available opportunity,
they are now hand in glove with your enemies in order to satisfy their
insatiable hunger for revenge.
Trust your enemy
Bad moments force you to
indulge in serious introspection. You look at the ledger of plus and
minus points more closely. You are ready to look at life afresh focusing
on where you were less careful, casual, and reckless. You begin to
appreciate why the enemy is out to exploit the weak points. Either you
have to fight back or yield your ground meekly and surrender. You find in
hindsight you are fighting with those whom you trusted most, whom you respected
most, and whom you embraced most. Suddenly you put all your competencies
and capabilities to the test. As Robert Greene said: “Without
enemies around us, we grow lazy. An enemy at our heels sharpens our wits,
keeping us focused and alert. It is sometimes better then, to use enemies as
enemies rather than transforming them into friends or allies.” The enemy would
make you think twice before initiating action. You are compelled to
generate multifarious options before marrying one. Forceful, innovative,
and creative actions replace casual, reckless, and lackadaisical moves. When
you begin to tread the path cautiously, you minimize the chances of
failure. When the problem is tossed around and you kick in multiple ways
to attack it ruthlessly putting all your energies to work, solutions surface
almost from nowhere. You realize you are at your best when confronted
with problems created by the joint army of friends & foes moving hand in
hand. Remember the saying: ‘the wise man profits more from his enemies
than a fool from his friends’. Knowing what would happen if you put a
finger in the mouth of a lion, you would stay clear of it. With friends,
you will have no such caution, and when you begin to trust them, they will eat
your life with ingratitude—trying their best to remove your glorious name from
the corporate lexicon. As Greene rightly concluded: ‘never let the
presence of enemies upset or distress you—you are far better off with a
declared opponent or two than not knowing where your real enemies lie’.
(with grateful
acknowledgments to Robert Greene, “The 48 Laws of Power”, Profile Books)
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